Sleep

(I hesitate to post this to seem ungrateful for how well my boys sleep or boastful about how well my boys sleep...today I post for myself, to remember these days.)

Dear Timothy,
You have become very verbal these days, particularly about sleep. You'd rather just continue on with your days, no stopping for sleeping, even though you don't hesitate to say that you're tired. You'd rather just play...but you need those hours of sleep as you've become a little more like mommy - grouchy when you don't get to sleep. You get to bed between 7:30-8p. and rise between 6-6:30a. Feel free to sleep till 7a. Lately, you've had a few earlier mornings, like that one day you woke and stayed up from 4-5a. just singing, and reminding us that you were "Ready to get out of bed all night, please mommy daddy. Please please please." You've also become a little bit more...imaginative we'll call it. You don't like it dark dark dark like before because the "curtains are scary." (Having more light in your room helps for sleeping away from home - thanks.) Unlike some of your friends, you usually only sleep about and hour and a half for naps and have needed to go down a little sooner than before since you're up earlier. Although, may I just say that I've enjoyed these past two days where you and your brother have taken fantastic two hour (or more) naps simultaneously. And I don't mind that we have time together in the afternoon before I have to crank out dinner. Thank you boys! Speaking of boys...

Dear Cayden,
I've been blessed by another wonderful nighttime sleeper. You usually go down around 7:30p and wake somewhere between 4:30-6a. to nurse again before going right back down for another two hours or so. You sometimes need a little comfort in the night and are soothed by just your passy. You do have "harder" nights where you wake up more times to nurse but then head right back to sleep. Naps tend to be about 50% difficult for us. The 45-minute "intruder" is familiar to you. He comes along after you've been sleeping for 45-50min and startles you awake. I do a "two helps and you're out" meaning, I'll help you twice by giving you your passy and/or trying my trick (sometimes two minutes of crying is enough to help you fall back asleep) before taking you out. My trick - covering your eyes; if it works I see your sweet little hands rise to touch mine and within a minute or two they drop limp as you've dosed back off. I imagine you just need a little comfort of knowing you're not alone. Then, there are fewer days when you take a three hour nap; those are the days I'm always checking to see if you're breathing. :)

I love you guys.

Rocket Man CJ!

I loved this outfit on Timothy and recently found it (in the wrong size box) and had to put it on before it became too small for Cayden. I'm loving all his expressions!

*Taken Aug. 23rd

Apples and Oranges

My boys have similarities and differences.

(top: Timothy, bottom: Cayden)

*Both pictures taken at 3mo.

Full

I feel so full on life right now. (I should just go ahead and make a disclaimer that there are hard days; I am not super mom.)

Full on friends having babies! I know of four people personally having babies in February and one blogger I follow. I'm glad to share in their joys of some first and some second children! I'm glad to share and not be the pregnant one. I hope that I'm listening to joys and struggles that they too will walk through. And I cannot wait to see all those precious little faces and new lives!

Full on laughter. My husband seems to be stepping it up these days on the witty department without really trying. My Timmy is beyond hysterical, and he really doesn't know how funny he is. He even tells me to stop laughing at him. Here's a short conversation we had at breakfast the other morning:
        Me-Do you want waffles?
        Tim-No, it's too early. (It was 7:30a.)
        Me-Do you want eggs?
        Tim-No, they make me nervous.

Full on my boys! They are just the best! Timothy is so smart (I know, everyone thinks their own kid is a rockstar). Which on that note, he is a rockstar - he has great rhythm and fantastic pitch. He also is getting really good at recognizing letters and numbers and using proper grammar. He even made this simile, "Harold the helicopter flies like birdies fly." And my little Cayden is so sweet. He is growing in leaps and bounds - has rolled from front to back a couple times and is desperately trying to roll from his back. He loves attention and will talk and talk if you give him the time of day. And boy does he laugh! It's such a joy!

I know that it's not always easy to see God's goodness in our lives, but it's so clear to me when I look at how full our life is.
       

I'm not pregnant...

anymore.

I know that physically but I think I had to let go of some of the emotions of it today. I think when you're pregnant, you get used to everyone staring at you (or seeming to stare at you). You get used to the questions of how far along you are, how big/small you are, what was your first labor like...etc. It comes somewhat familiar that once you have your baby you realize you've lost something.

All the maternity clothes still catch my eye; "Oh, so cute. Wait...I don't need those anymore." I see other pregnant ladies and try not to stare...yes, the belly is so beautiful to me. When I walk into the store, I'm just another mom. And when I'm alone, I'm just another woman. No one knows who I am...or for that matter even cares. Usually, I'm happy for the few moments I get alone. Today I just felt a little sad. I'm just me again. So, I am trying to let that "pregnant" part of me go.

But on most days I remember, a much larger part of me is SO happy to not be pregnant anymore (it was a harder pregnancy this last time), and I'm SO SO happy to have my little Cayden in my arms. There are so many joys these days toss in with a little craziness. :)

I'm not pregnant anymore.